Last night in a fit of insecurity/pathos/general malaise, I was lamenting the fact that I am not much of a “blank slate” artist. I always do better (or at least feel better) when I have a directive (art-wise, anyway. Life-wise I tend to do better without any directive, strangely enough). While I was lamenting that fact, I was equally lamenting the fact that some of my favorite work has come when I’ve really embraced the blank slate, i.e. when I have no idea at all and just draw draw draw, channeling something I don’t really know what it is or where it comes from (the problem being, I don’t really know what it is or where it comes from). And then while I was lamenting that fact, I was simultaneously lamenting the fact that a lot of the drawings I like the most (dark, messy, pointy boobs, gnarly hands) are the ones that the viewing public generally likes the least, preferring instead the ones I seem to like the least (cute bunnies).

I have recently been trying my hand at more planned out compositions (see Midnight Swim, Industry, Sudden Rain). I have liked very much they way that they came out. Though I am also nostalgic for the days when I just chunked things out willy-nilly (Snow Bunny, Inorganic, Frog and Butterfly) and got to be surprised and delighted at the outcome.

All of this is to say that I am of two minds. I want art direction, and then I also don’t. I want to sell things at auction, but I don’t want them to always be cute animals. Which I am compelled to draw because I like to please people. (Though, in everyone’s defense, some kind people have also bought the weirder ones, for which I am grateful.)

So here’s the deal. I’ve added a function/widget over there —–> in the right sidebar called “Prompt Robbi” where you can make suggestions of things that I should draw for auction items. I may or may not take the bait. Other folks can vote for which ideas they like best, which might just sway me, since I am a pleaser at heart. If no one comes up with anything compelling, I will just draw dark, messy drawings of pointy boobs and gnarly hands. And nobody will buy them. And the auction will become defunct. And I will have another tragic evening of insecurity/pathos/general malaise.

And we wouldn’t want that, now, would we?

In writing this post, I’m working under a few assumptions:

1) You value art in some way, or at the least, you do not hate it.
2) You are inspired, or at least intrigued, at the thought of innovative ways of distributing creative merchandise.
3) You spent at least part of the holiday weekend outdoors, and in so doing, noticed that your t-shirt collection could use some refreshing.

Now, a bit of background:

Months ago now, we promised a free t-shirt to he or she who placed third in the Nasty Chipmunk Essay Competition. Said t-shirt (yet undesigned, at the the time) was to feature a cross-eyed zebra and the words “Nice Guys Finish Third.” The winners were named, two people tied for third place, and there the issue stood, us not designing or producing the t-shirt and the winners going unrewarded.

Until now.

Using the holiday weekend to dust some cobwebs off her TO DO list, Robbi sat down and designed the zebra t-shirt. The result pleases us so much that we both want one for ourselves.

Here it is:

Here’s where things get murky. We could either order four shirts on Zazzle (two for the winners and two more for ourselves) for around $80, or for $260, we could order 20 shirts, leaving 16 for the likes of you.

So here’s what we propose: If 11 of you out there in the Idiots’Blog readership also admire this shirt and want one for yourselves, we will be able to have it nicely printed and break even. And if an additional five of you decide you want one, we could actually make a small profit! It’s the same business model that fuels the subscription service. Why not, we say, try it with shirts?

So, if you like this shirt and would gladly part with $18 to buy one, send me an email and we’ll start a tally. As soon as we get to 11, we’ll call the t-shirt people and get the presses rolling.

But here’s the thing, this model only works if those who say they want the t-shirt actually end up buying it. So we’ll invoke the honor system and call it an experiment. At worst, we’ll be out $260 bucks, but at best, we could start a new way of distributing small-run t-shirt designs.

And whatever comes to pass, we’ll both have (what we believe to be) a really stellar shirt.

Let us know what you think. Comment to this post or write me an email if you want in. And be sure to let me know what size you want (unisex S, M, L, XL, XXL).

Though it does not come naturally to either of us, Robbi and I do our best to run Idiots’Books as a business. We have a spreadsheet on which we keep track of how much we take in and how much we spend. The numbers are a dizzying affair. We have a sense that we are breaking even, but results are inconclusive. Let’s just say, I’m not yet ready to quit my day job.

In spite of our constant wrestling with financial realities, Robbi has decided that the time is now to give away some art. I asked her why, and she said she thought it “would be nice.” I asked her how we were planning to leverage free art into personal gain, and she said that she wasn’t interested in that sort of thing. In spite of my deliberate attempts to squeeze every nickel out of every single thing that Robbi draws, she sees Idiots’Books as a nice sort of small press that promotes beauty and champions the everyman.

Blech, I say. And phooey. And fie.

But Robbi is always right (one of the governing mantras of my life), and so I will tell you her plan: once a month or so we post an original illustration and send it forth with no exchange of dollars to some reader of this blog. All you have to do to proclaim your interest is post a comment to this entry. We will choose at random among those of you who do. I suggested that we award the prize to the cleverest response, but apparently Robbi has no use for cleverness. She just wants to give away some art. It rankles to my very core.

So comment if you are interested, and when you do, feel free to write anything. Even “fie” will do the trick, as will “phooey” and “blech.” I already have my comment prepared, and it involves all three of these words.

Here’s the aforementioned free art, a little ditty called But it Feels Like Autumn, the third in the series of unexpected images that Robbi drew the other day.

And here’s a detail. I like how when you look up close, it just becomes a pile of paint.

Disgustedly, I await your comments. We’re giving you a week to come up with something to say. We’ll announce the winner next Tuesday afternoon.