As promised, here are the answers to Matthew Draws XI. It seems we fooled none of you. But in deference to the established protocol, I will opt for the slow reveal.
We gave you this:
With the exception of an errant Fred Savage, Ira Glass, and Charlie Sheen, all of you correctly guessed, that this disheveled fellow is yours truly.
True to form, friend and subscriber Peter applied his facial recognition software, which suggested that this might be Pierce Brosnan or some Estonian model named Carmen Kass. Frankly, I’m flattered.
And then we threw you this softball:
One of you guessed that this was Ellen Page, one ventured Chelsea Clinton, and another wondered if it might be either Emily Dickinson or Frida Kahlo.
But the rest of you saved my marriage by correctly guessing that this was none other than Robbi.
This time, Peter’s software came up with Robbie Williams or Ralph Lauren. I’m guessing Robbi is less than flattered.
I may one day catch some major flak for this drawing:
While I certainly can’t blame those of you who guessed Chucky or Carrot Top, I appreciate those of you who were able to see past the bizarrely compressed facial features and crazed, sunken eyes and recognize my subject as Alden.
The vote from Peter’s software: Lucille Ball. I’m guessing Lucille might not be pleased by this assessment.
We followed up with this:
Seemingly recognizing a theme at this point, all but a handful of you (we had another Chucky and another Charlie Sheen) recognized this small fellow as Kato.
Peter’s software was confounded by my drawing of Kato. Apparently, his likeness does not exist in the world of celebrities. I’ve long suspected that he was one of a kind.
Then came the true challenge, or so I thought.
Once again, Peter’s software was baffled, but the rest of you weren’t. It seems I underestimated you. You all got it right, and I really enjoyed some of your answers. My favorites include:
A bear baby? A beer belly? A swan swimming?
I prefer Tarzan to naked mole rat, but that’s the first thing that came to mind.
Holy shit, am I pregnant? (This from Robbi’s doppelganger Marigold, who, according to the sundry uncanny parallelisms of her and Robbi’s lives, probably IS pregnant. Sorry, Marigold! I’m pretty sure it’s not mine.)
By now there should be little doubt that this is none other than Billie Jean King Swanson, due to grace us with his/her presence on December 19th.
Cute little sucker, I think. But that’s probably just the proud presumptive papa in me talking.