Hello, friends. It’s Friday. You have questions. I have answers. Let’s do this.

Every week I force myself to draw a sweet young thing, because every week I feel misguided confidence that this will be the week I manage not to make her look horrible.

Here she is.

Did I succeed?

I did not, though many of you were confident that I had.

I got lots of guesses for Jennifer Lawrence. Alas, I was not drawing JLaw.

Also you guessed Kirsten Dunst.

But far and away, the most popular guess was Cameron Diaz. In fact, some of you were so confident as to praise me for my work.

• I’m OK w/ your quirky smile, Cameron Diaz, just worried about the parasites crawling past your mouth to burrow into your right ear.
• Yes. Cameron Diaz. Totally.
• Cameron Diaz love the smile!
• Chilli Pepper Mouth … or Cameron Diaz
• yes, of course I do, you are Cameron Diaz. There’s some lunch on your face, btw.
• Cameron Diaz! You totally nailed this one! Unless, of course, it’s Sassy McDuckLips. Then again, they are one and the same! Nice work!

Other guesses that are, sadly, not correct:

• Amy Poehler? Mostly all I can see is a banana for a mouth.
• Kirsten DunstGeena Davis
• Kris Kardashian
• Meg Ryan 
• Emma Watson
• Katie Couric (after a stroke)
• Kristen Chenowith
• Amy Adams
• Robbi
• Jennifer Aniston with caterpillars on her face

Next I did myself the favor of drawing a man with distinctive physical characteristics. This is where, typically speaking, I have the greatest success.

I am delighted to say that many of you got this one right. So thanks. After the first-quarter shutout, I needed a lift.

But first, a few of the incorrect guesses:

• Mitch McConnell with teeth implants 
• Holy shit! WTF?
• Al Gore
• Some right wing congressman
• Milton Berle
• Rodney Dangerfield
• John Goodman’s Chinese brother
• A Carnie…The Radish Nose Man? That, or Milton Berle.
• Donald Bigot Sterling (self-appointed good guy)
• At first I thought the chef from that Chase commercial, but he has less hair… but still, smily asian man!
• Jackie Gleason, maybe?
• Ronald Reagan
• Bryan Cranston
• Star Trek priceline man?
• That character actor whose eyes disappear when he smiles, often is cast as a sheriff…
• Yes of course. you are Michael Caine.
• Matthew

Thanks much to whomever wrote this, “John Goodman! You totally nailed this one too! Unless, of course, it’s Chris Christie, pretending to be a good guy.” Your support is much appreciated.

First of all, most of you got this one right. All but a few of you. Which makes me feel great. This session of Matthew Draws is moving in a positive direction. 

Those of you who were less successful offered such guesses as:

• Pink? (I always feel like I need to phrase my answers in the form of a question.)
• Adele
• Audrey Hepburn
• Kate Blanchett
• Rhianna
• Billie Holiday
• Cyndi Lauper
• Lupita Nyong’o
• Robin Roberts
• Even after limiting it to famous females with short hair, I have no idea
• Joan Crawford? She looks like she is begging for forgiveness with her eyes, and regrets the wire hanger incident

But the correct answer is…

Lucille Ball.

Though my favorite of the (many) correct answers is this:

Lucille Ball! You totally nailed this one too! Unless, of course, it’s Ella Fitzgerald, who, strangely enough, looks nothing like Lucille Ball and yet looks exactly like this drawing.

Because that observation is absolutely true.

To my shock AND delight, quite a few of you got this right! Does this mean I’m improving? Does it mean I’m not sufficiently challenging myself when choosing my subjects? I don’t know. And for this precious moment, I don’t care.

Here’s who he’s not:

• My plumber’s brother.
• Yeesh. IDK – Shifty McShifterson?
• Someone like Leonardo DiCaprio, but definitely not DiCaprio.
• Channing Tatum
• Elijiah Wood serving his best early 90s Luke Perry?
• Young Marlon Brando
• Unchristian Slater
• Aaron Paul
• Marlon Brando when he was young and hot
• My former student (for a day) who had just gotten out of jail. He stayed five minutes and said, “I’m out dog.” Never saw him again until now”
• My first instinct is Robert Pattinson, but I’d be surprised if I’m right. Then again, I’m pretty sure you’re not drawing the guy begging for gas money at the gas station yesterday, so I’ll stick with the first answer. Though it looks more like the second.
• Joey Tribbiani the morning after a bender. How You doin’?
• Zac Efron
• Woody Harrelson or Woody Harrelson look-alike
• Javier Bardem
• Hot Actor whose name escapes me…. So I will go with the Garfield guy of Dating Emma Stone fame.
• The Franco who isn’t James.
• That guy Aaron something who plays the young meth dealer on Breaking Bad. 
• Mr. Twilight
• Sean Gideon, a guy I went to college with, but I have no idea why Matthew would know him, unless he checks out my Facebook friends.
• Jake M. Johnson
• Matt Dillon
• Clearly this is Matthew, the artist himself, giving the mirror his best sometimes I pretend I look like Matt Dillon expression.

• What’s his name? The little guy. Tom Cruise.

And now for the bonus fun. This week, we asked…

Which of these people most deserves to be sent to another planet to live, and why?

• Oh Gosh, easy – Mitch McConnell and I assume the reasons why could go without elaboration.
• You say “deserves” as if these people did something bad, but they all seem like pretty decent folks this time around. Maybe Al Gore, if the other planet had less carbon in the atmosphere.
• I will allow all of these people to remain on our planet.
• John Goodman should be sent to a planet where his utter genius is truly appreciated. Also, fat joke.
• Lucille Ball, cuz demonstrating for aliens how NOT to do things on Earth would be way more entertaining than just getting the straight scoop.
• Tom Cruise has earned a ticket home, but John Goodman would make the best ambassador for why the aliens should spare the human race.
• Oh… no contest… Meg Ryan for the botched face work alone.
• If #4 is Tom Cruise it’s got to be him. Although, I usually feel that he already lives on another planet. So he wouldn’t need to be sent there.
• My former student. 
• 1 or 4, but only if I’m right on who 2 and 3 are.
• All of them. A classic representation of Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus.
• Joan Crawford – clearly she is not sorry
• Fucking Donald Sterling, that’s who.
• Tom Cruise. Because Tom Cruise.
• No comment.
• Any Franco anywhere, always.
• Definitely Tom Cruise. Because at some point he should go back home.
• I think Tom Cruise is already there.
• Rhiana. For obvious reasons.
• Tom Cruise because so many people don’t like him and he’s in far too many movies. Also I think he’d probably be the most likely of the group to survive the transition.
• #3 – Billie Holiday, because she can soothe the creatures on that planet with her voice (or if it’s Lucy, she can make them laugh)
• None! I like them all.
• Can we just send Matthew? He knows why.