It has already been pointed out that I did not make good on my promise to post the results of the AKMBRAD contest on Saturday morning. My only excuse is that I spent the day turning 36 and eating a lot of baked goods.

The weekend is over now, I’m back at my desk, and the time has come to reveal the winner(s):

Honorable Mention goes to Matt Carrick, who did produce the longest list of words, but who did not follow the rules. Apparently, his 29 words were drafted without the restrictions of the one-minute limitation. But I credit him for promptly admitting his lawlessness in a subsequent comment. Thanks, Matt, for being a beacon in these dark times. There is so little integrity left these days in games involving cookies. For your admirable combination of word skills and honor, you win a damaged copy of Ten Thousand Stories that I stepped on with my boot. Please write me an email, and give me your address.

First place goes to Virginia, who came up with 26 words in an actual minute. Upon further reflection (with the benefit of additional time), she produced 13 more (though some of these were arguably illegal, proper names that apparently would not have counted were she playing this game in the car on a road trip with her siblings in her youth).

Robbi and I agree that props recognition must be given to my sister Andy, for offering ” ‘mbark.” For a prize, she will have to settle for a tiny dose of satisfaction. I only stepped on one copy of Ten Thousand Stories this holiday season.

The real winner of the AKMBRAD contest has already claimed her prize.

While we were out for my birthday dinner, we made the mistake of leaving Iggy in the living room. We returned to find a pile of red ribbons on the floor and the bottom half of our Christmas tree curiously denuded of edible ornaments.

The casualties included my beautiful, misshapen A, without which, the range of possibilities afforded by this contest would have been significantly reduced.

Conclusion: Don’t get a dog. Don’t put cookies on your Christmas tree. Or, don’t turn 36.

In honor of our winner, Virginia, I have compiled our collective master list, so that we can all reflect on our collaborative genius. Together, we came up with 47 words (the questionable merits of certain among them notwithstanding.) In case you’re interested, the three most frequently guessed words were “mad,” “mark,” and “ram,” each of which appeared on nine of your lists.

‘mbark
a
A.K.A.
ab
ad
Adam
Akbar
am
Arab
arb
ark
arm
baa
bad
Baka
bam
bar
bard
bark
barm
bra
brad
da
dab
Dakar
dam
Dara
dark
darma
drab
dram
drama
ka
Kara
karma
ma
ma’am
maar
Mab
mad
mama
mar
Mara
mark
Ra
rad
ram

Thanks to all who participated. Tune in this time next year for more fun. Though, unless we add a new member to this family, the permutations are not likely to change any. Perhaps we’ll have to let Iggy, Oscar, and Lily in on the fun.