Yesterday was a banner day here at the barn. After much consideration, Matthew and I decided that Alden and Kato have become so independent that it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to give them a bit of a coming-of-age gift. Just a little something to let them know, “we trust you. We believe you can make your own decisions and that you can handle your independence in a mature and level-headed way.”

So we bought them a new car.

Or, should I say, we received one in the mail full of toner.

Alden got to take the first spin. She was thrilled. She said it handled well, had good pick-up, and the dashboard was classy but not too obtrusive. She especially liked admiring how she looked in her new ride.

True to form, she didn’t fuss, didn’t whine, when it was Kato’s turn to try it out. We knew she could handle this responsibility with class. Kato first just sat in it, enjoying that new car smell.

Then he turned it on.

“This baby can sing!” he exclaimed. He took it for a spin around the kitchen. Then down the hall into Alden’s room. It was when he got on the carpet that things started to go wrong. “This thing’s got no power!” he yelled. “What is this, a slant-four?! Where’s my four-wheel drive?!! What kind of guy do you think I am?!!! I can’t drive this piece of sh**!!!”

We took the keys away. We put the toner back inside. We put it in a cupboard for another day, in the distant future, when his highness proves he can handle the responsibility without the macho attitude.